i don't believe in astrology but i am interested in the fact that people believe in it, and as a cultural phenomenon and for the narratives astrologers construct! the australian mystic medusa is especially good :

for taureans mars is officially retro (until mid-nov), you’ve embarked on your ‘spiritual warrior’ bender, turfing out decayed resentments, shadowy subliminal messaging, and habitual thought or emotion loops. you will never again experience such a strong phase for self-knowing and the confrontation of personal ghosts.

doesn't that sound awesome? literally. and many people could do with more awe in their lives. it makes you wish you were a taurean. oh wait. i am one!

but of course there are as many ways of interpreting a retro mars as there are interpretations of the most mysterious parts of the talmud but this is the one you could choose to believe.

i used to have a party trick where i would drink an enormous amount of beer and wine and vodka or gin or whiskey and i would say to someone who was boring me at some party or in a bar : what starsign are you? i bet you are a scorpio! and then if they were a scorpio they would be amazed and if they said i am pisces, i would say : i knew you were either scorpio or pisces!

this was in a small outback town in australia, not quite pre-internet but a personal computer with a built in modem which you could connect to the telephone line if no one wanted to call anyone or be able to be called by anyone was still considered an innovation, so we had to think up our own entertainment.